Its not just boobs or bottles
Feeding the first two weeks for a developmentally and medically typical newborn are often considered to fall under two categories, formula or breastfeeding. This, however, is an overly simplified view of feeding. Feeding can,, generally, be pumping breastmilk exclusively, breastfeeding via breast exclusively, breastmilk through breast and pumping, mixture of breastfeeding and formula, and formula exclusively. Within each of those options there may be complications or changes such as baby preferring certain bottle types, learning curves with latching, figuring out sizing for pump parts, nipple injuries, formula allergies, and many others.
When considering type of feeding, unlike in the other categories, I typically consider researching what my options are in general and what are the most common benefits and challenges that arise. I want to consider the pros and cons of each before I can decide which may align with my views and values. When doing this research, as I always recommend, utilize different resources to answer the same questions. This helps ensure you have a diverse amount of perspectives which allows for better understanding and a greater likelihood of accuracy.
I recommend considering a more direct approach for this category because we may consider something as aligning with our values but our lifestyle does not align with that choice. Then that becomes a dilemma we need to work through. For example, someone may want to exclusively breastfeed directly from breast but has to return to work and thus this needs to be navigated. Or formula costs may need to be considered for a parent who wants to follow a formula exclusive plan. Compared to other categories, feeding is, in my opinion, more likely to create dilemmas quickly than other categories. Some are predictable, like finances or work, and others not, such as having anatomical challenges breastfeeding or allergies to formula or something mom is eating which passes through breastmilk.
Once you have basic information about the options for feeding you can then consider your values and belief systems as discussed in other categories. You may consider values on nutrition, health, finances, bonding (yourself but also others), development, time, and other roles (work, other children, hobbies). Once you do so you may start leaning towards a type of feeding. You then, however, want to consider contextual factors such as time required, work or leave schedule, help available, finances, personal medical history, and other such factors. As mentioned these two things may be at odds and you want to work through that.
Since its hard to know what you do not know, for this category it can be helpful to come up with questions based on your situation. Or what helped me finding friends, family or proactively joining some groups online (such as groups for moms who pumped or combined fed or whatever) and hearing about their experiences can help you make a more informed decision.
Once you have made a tentative decision you may want to consider the most common challenges and have resources available. For example, knowing a few types of formulas in case there are allergies or knowing lactation consultants in the area if there are breastfeeding challenges. This will then aid you in a more comprehensive list of object you may need to support you, how much of each you need and what types of variety you may want. This will also aid you in knowing what questions you want to ask others. For example, how much variety in bottles you may want or how many extra pump parts may help you or what supplies help produce breastmilk.
More than that though, its important to know there is no perfectly right way. Feeding is one of the subjects many people have strong opinions about. Its okay to make the decision that is best for your family. For me, when I take the approach I am sharing I feel more confident and more able to ignore and challenge the thoughts or doubts (inside my own mind) or statements made to me. I know I considered all options and everything unique about my family to make the choice that would best serve my child. In my opinion, the best approach and the right approach is what you feel is right for you when considering options intentionally. Otherwise, you would increase stress or challenges for your family which in itself can be impactful.
What have you thought about for your family?
